Let’s talk about graduation for a bit…

Every year for the past 15 I’ve been going to graduation ceremonies, parties and soirees. Some interesting phenomena have appeared over time.
First let’s talk about apparel. What is the right thing to wear to Grad? Many considerations need to be taken into account:
A] If you won the fashion and design award and made your own grad dress, in order to get said award you must wear your dress to grad – regardless of whether or not it was finished. Note: it is obligatory for the fashion and design teacher to compliment you on your lovely dress once you are up on stage.
B] It is always necessary for one male to wear a kilt and full formal Scottish piping band regalia. Unless said male is the winner of the fashion and design award. It matters little if you actually have any Scottish blood in your veins – apparently you only need to be able to drink like one.
C] Apparently, if you are a girl, your goal is to reveal as much skin as your parents will let you get away with. On the other hand it will seem like you are revealing more skin if:
-you are a larger person
-you haven’t spent the last 5 months tanning for this event and are white as a ghost.
-you are an exceptionally skinny person
D] Guys: sure it’s cool to rent a tux but you have no idea that the insides of those things become your own personal swimming pool after you’ve sweated all your body fluids into them during the 2½ hour ceremony in the sauna they call a church. After about half an hour you will start thinking about what a lucky nut the kilt dude is.
E] If you buy your own suit for the occasion you will only sweat a little less and joy of joys you get to keep it after its all said and done. Have fun with that!
Second let’s talk every thing else:
a) One student will receive the lion’s share of the awards. Invariably this person will be a female and will be sitting in the middle of a row at the furthest back part of the church. She will not receive her awards in one lump sum but nicely spread out over the entire ceremony. (There was a slight exception this year: Vicki Reimer won 14 awards – she got six of them at once and by a miracle was sitting in the aisle seat – congratulations Vicki)
b) 2 or 3 students will be hammered before they get to the ceremony. Usually guys. Dead give away: They are stumbling through the processional. Ironically the girls with the crinolined-taffeta dresses will do just fine even though everyone will hold their breath each they go up to get an award.
c) Somebody always shows up in a limousine. The bigger the limo the more likely the passengers will qualify for item b)
Once again Mark and I made it to grad this year and scammed a couple seat up front close to the action (it pays to know the staff at the school). And once again we managed to have a reason to exit early. But not before we got our annual fix of youth dancing with adulthood. There are always a few opportunities for laughter and some shared wide-eyed expressions between us. And every year we kick ourselves for wearing as hot clothing as we have.
Mark said something on the way home that has made me stop and think. Grad really feels like a time when we let go of the kids. To me there is always a lot of sadness when I realize that I have to let go of my role in their lives. I also look forward to it in some ways. Grads flounce around pretending adulthood for a day. Many of them won’t touch formal wear again unless they get married. But after a year out of high school, my relationship will change with these kids. They will know life in a different way and I can count on having discussions and conversations and a new kind of relationship with them. In fact most of my good friends are former youth group people. People I now relate to more like peers. I love that part of my job. But there is always some sadness. I realize that some students will not make the successful jump to adulthood. And at grad you can kind of see it slipping away a bit. It is disappointing to see the kids heading out to the binge party they call “SAFE GRAD” after you’ve poured your life into them. But not only that you get the distinct feeling that some of them are not ready to handle the challenges of the world they are about to meet. You wish you could be there for them. It’s an intense enough emotion that like Mark sometimes you weigh the ‘success’ of your ministry in this balance.
So congratulations to all the grads! I wish you God’s richest blessings! I will pray for you! And should the need arise I am still here firmly planted in the windy soil of Coaldale.


for pics of this years grads from our youth group visit here